Every year on my birthday since I was 11, a white gardenia（栀子花）was sent to my house. No card ever came with it. I called the flower shop, but it was not _______ at all. After some times I stopped trying to _______ the sender’s name and was just pleased with the beautiful flower in soft pink paper.

I couldn’t stop _______ who the giver might be. Some of my _______ and sweetest moments were spent daydreaming（幻想）about the sender. My mother encouraged these daydreams. She would ask me if I had been especially _______ to someone. Perhaps it was one of my classmates, or the old man who I once helped. As a girl, I had more fun imagining that it might be a boy that I had _______ .

A month before my high school graduation, my father died. I was so sad that I became _______ uninterested in my coming graduation dance, and I didn’t care _______ I had a new dress or not. My mother, though she was in her own _______ , she would not let me miss any of those things. She wanted her children to ________ loved, to be much like the gardenia: lovely, strong and perfect.

My mother died ten years after I was married. That was the year the gardenia stopped coming.

As a boy, like all other boys, I wanted to be a man. But my parents did everything for me.

Actually, they ________ every minute of my life. Although they loved me, I felt a bit unhappy with them. “Do your homework!” “Practice your piano.” “Turn off the TV!” I became so bored with their ________ like these that I wished they would leave me alone.

Well, my wish came true! Although my parents were very worried about leaving me, they had to go away on business for a few days. Now was my ________! I could have some fun at last! ________ I got home from school the first day, I happily threw my schoolbag on the sofa and ate lots of snacks. Then I enjoyed an exciting film on TV, and after that I played computer games. I ________ the games so much that I played until midnight.

The next morning I woke up late. I had to hurry to school without breakfast, but I was still late. The teacher asked me for homework, but I ________ hand it in. With an empty stomach, I was unable to play basketball with my classmates! I felt ________ and sleepy at school all day long.

When I got home, I tried to cook some rice, but I burnt it. I found myself so bad at simple cooking tasks. I started to feel ________. I wanted Mom and Dad to come home soon. Mum cooked such delicious food, and made sure I never forgot my homework. Dad always helped me with any difficult questions, and told funny jokes when I was unhappy. Then I ________ being home alone was not always perfect.

When my parents came home, they were happy to find that I could cook and tidy up now. I told them my home alone story, and we all ________.

“Mom, I don’t like you,” my two-year-old son said.

“Okay… is that because you love me?” I asked.

“No, you’re not lovely.”

That night, as I washed my face, I _____ a little longer in the mirror—not because I was hurt by his _____, but because I noticed there was no light in my eyes.

I took out a pen and started writing a list—a list to _____ myself; a list to put sparkles（闪烁的光、亮点）back into my eyes. I once made many lists but seldom accomplished （完成） anything. This time would be _____!

The first goal on my list I wanted to achieve was joining a Polar Plunge to raise money for the Special Olympics. On that day, when I ______ into my 1980s workout clothes, Jack smiled, “Mom, you look pretty.” Maybe, just maybe some light ______ my eyes.

When coming out of the cold lake, I felt happy and proud. I kept screaming, “I made it!” But one of the most exciting parts of the day was when I stood in front of my ______, which was taped on the refrigerator door. I ticked item number one. With that, I began to take back my life.

Everyone taking part in the Polar Plunge received a shirt. Whenever I wore it, Jack asked, “Is that your Polar Plunge clothing?” I answered proudly, “Yes!” “I want to do that too,” I was happy he remembered I jumped into a ______ lake, and that he wanted to do activities with me.

With each ______ crossed off the list, piece of myself is ______. Not only am I showing my family it’s important to dream, but I’m showing myself that I’m worth it.