We can make mistakes at any age. Some mistakes we make are about money. But most mistakes are about people. One might say, “Did Jerry really care when I broke up (分手) with Helen?” “When I got that great job, did Jim really feel good about it, as a friend? Or did he envy (妒忌) my luck?” When we look back, doubts (怀疑) like these can make us feel bad.
Why do we go wrong about our friends? Sometimes what people want to say hides their real meaning. And if we don’t really listen, we miss the feeling behind the words. If someone tells you “You’re a lucky dog”, is he really on your side? If he says, “You are a lucky guy.” That’s being friendly. But if he says “a lucky dog”, there’s a bit of envy in those words. Maybe he doesn’t see it himself. But he puts you down a little if he brings in the “dog”. What he may say is that he doesn’t think you deserve (应得) your luck.
“Just think of all the things you have to be thankful for” is another phrase that says one thing and means another. It could mean that the speaker is trying to get you to see your problem as part of your life as a whole. But is he? The thought in this phrase is that your problem isn’t important. It’s telling you to think of all the starving (挨饿的) people in the world when you haven’t got a date for Saturday night.
How can you tell the real meaning behind someone’s words? One way is to take a good look at the person talking. Do his words fit the way he looks? Does what he says agree with the tone (语气) of voice, his posture (立场), or the look in his eyes? Stop and think. The minute you spend thinking about the real meaning of what people say to you may save another mistake. So when you hear someone saying, please try to know what he really means. Don’t just listen to what he says with your ears but feel the words he uses with your head. In this way you may make fewer mistakes.
【小题1】The reason why we go wrong about our friends is that _________.| A．we never believe what they say |
| B．we cannot listen carefully when they talk |
| C．they sometimes say one thing but mean another |
| D．they become angry when we know what they really mean |
| A．his tone, his posture and the look in his eyes |
| B．his real meaning of what he says |
| C．his way the person is talking |
| D．his look when he is talking |
| A．what to do when we listen to others talking |
| B．how to tell the real meaning behind the words |
| C．what to do when we know the wrong we will do |
| D．how to avoid mistakes when talking with people |
