We can make mistakes at any age. Some mistakes we make are about money. But most mistakes are about people. One might say, “Did Jerry really care when I broke up (分手) with Helen?” “When I got that great job, did Jim really feel good about it, as a friend? Or did he envy (妒忌) my luck?” When we look back, doubts (怀疑) like these can make us feel bad.
Why do we go wrong about our friends? Sometimes what people want to say hides their real meaning. And if we don’t really listen, we miss the feeling behind the words. If someone tells you “You’re a lucky dog”, is he really on your side? If he says, “You are a lucky guy.” That’s being friendly. But if he says “a lucky dog”, there’s a bit of envy in those words. Maybe he doesn’t see it himself. But he puts you down a little if he brings in the “dog”. What he may say is that he doesn’t think you deserve (应得) your luck.
“Just think of all the things you have to be thankful for” is another phrase that says one thing and means another. It could mean that the speaker is trying to get you to see your problem as part of your life as a whole. But is he? The thought in this phrase is that your problem isn’t important. It’s telling you to think of all the starving (挨饿的) people in the world when you haven’t got a date for Saturday night.
How can you tell the real meaning behind someone’s words? One way is to take a good look at the person talking. Do his words fit the way he looks? Does what he says agree with the tone (语气) of voice, his posture (立场), or the look in his eyes? Stop and think. The minute you spend thinking about the real meaning of what people say to you may save another mistake. So when you hear someone saying, please try to know what he really means. Don’t just listen to what he says with your ears but feel the words he uses with your head. In this way you may make fewer mistakes.
【小题1】The reason why we go wrong about our friends is that _________.A.we never believe what they say |
B.we cannot listen carefully when they talk |
C.they sometimes say one thing but mean another |
D.they become angry when we know what they really mean |
A.his tone, his posture and the look in his eyes |
B.his real meaning of what he says |
C.his way the person is talking |
D.his look when he is talking |
A.what to do when we listen to others talking |
B.how to tell the real meaning behind the words |
C.what to do when we know the wrong we will do |
D.how to avoid mistakes when talking with people |
How do you feel when your teacher asks you to work on a group project with other students? Do you like to work together with others or work alone?
The Programme for International Student Assessment, or PISA, carried out a survey on students’ abilities to work together in groups. They found that students who do well on tests by themselves are also likely to be better at working with other people.
This finding was true for many countries. Students in Japan, South Korea, Finland and Canada, where test scores are high, also did well in working together to solve problems.
But this was not the case for every country. Chinese students, who usually achieve good grades, showed only average abilities to work together.
“One reason might be that Chinese parents and teachers focus too much on grades,” said Zhao Zhongxin, former vice president of the Chinese Family Education Association. “Students have a lot of exam pressure and they view school as a place for competition.”
“However, collaborative(合作的) skills are very important to prepare students for today’s society,” he added. “Luckily, more Chinese parents and teachers are realizing the importance of this and are thinking of ways to help students improve this skill.”
Another interesting finding from the PISA survey was that girls tend to be better than boys at working together. They said girls show more positive attitudes (积极的态度) towards relationships, which means they are more willing to listen to others’ opinions.
PISA also found that the classroom environment tends to influence how well students collaborate. In classes where there are a lot of activities that require communication, such as class debates, students tend to have better attitudes toward collaborating.
【小题1】PISA did a survey about students’ ability to ________.A.work with other people |
B.get high scores on tests |
C.solve difficult problems |
D.make plans for school projects |
A.Because they prefer to work by themselves. |
B.Because their parents don’t teach them such skills. |
C.Because they usually see others as competitors. |
D.Because they don’t think they’ll need this skill. |
A.Give students high scores on every test. |
B.Help students get used to exam pressure. |
C.Make girls work with girls more than boys. |
D.Design more communicative activities in class. |
A.Girls are better at working with others than boys. |
B.Good class activities help students perform better in exams. |
C.Collaborative skills are less important than scores for students. |
D.In China, students who do well on tests are also better at collaboration. |
Join the discussion
Lake lander ●2 hours ago
Today, a man talked very loud on his phone on a train between Malvern and Reading, making many passengers upset. I wonder how he would react (反应) if I were to read my newspaper out loud on the train. I have never had the courage to do it, though.
Pak50 ●57 minutes ago
Why not give it a try? Perhaps you should take lessons on a musical instrument. The late musician Dennis Brian is said to have asked a fellow train passenger to turn off his radio. When his request was refused, he took out his French horn (号) and started to practice.
Angie O’Edema ●42 minutes ago
I don’t see how musical instruments can help improve manners in public. Don’t do to others what you wouldn’t like to be done to yourself. Once, a passenger next to me talked out loud on his mobile phone. I left my seat quietly, giving him some privacy to finish his conversation. He realized this and said “Sorry” to me. When his phone rang again later, a bit of respect and cooperation (合作) can do the job better.
Taodas ●29 minutes ago
I did read my newspaper out loud on a train, and it turned out well. The guy accepted it peacefully, and we chatted happily all the way to Edinbergh.
Sophie 76 ●13 minutes ago
I have not tried reading my newspaper out loud on a train, but, several years ago, I read some chapters (章节) from Harry Potter to my bored and noisy children. Several passengers seemed to appreciate what I did.
【小题1】The passenger said “Sorry” to Angie O’Edema because ________.A.the passenger offered his seat to someone else |
B.the passenger spoke very loudly on his phone |
C.the passenger refused to talk with Angie O’Edema |
D.Angie O’Edema gave the passenger some advice |
A.Pak50. | B.Angie O’Edema. | C.Taodas. | D.Sophie 76. |
A.Because another passenger was talking loud on the phone. |
B.Because someone was practicing a musical instrument. |
C.Because his children would not keep quiet on the train. |
D.Because he felt so bored on the train. |
A.Richard Lair 58 minutes ago. | B.Charlie Watts 31 minutes ago. |
C.Jimmy Page 8 minutes ago. | D.Nick Mason 2 and a half hours ago. |
A.How to react to bad behavior. | B.How to kill time on a train. |
C.How to chat with strangers. | D.How to make a phone call. |
Some people think making new friends might make them feel nervous in school.
Forget your fear and just talk to someone.
It’s easier said than done. But try to take a deep breath and find your voice. Don’t be afraid to approach (接近) people.
Take part in after-class activities that interest you. Try to make friends in the clubs. If you don’t join anything, you will be just going to class and then going home. Being in a club makes you more social.
Stay clean.
No one likes a bad smell that could knock someone over. Shower every day, brush your teeth and wash your hair.
Be respectful (尊重的) of people’s differences.
A.Join clubs. |
B.But don’t worry, because you are not alone. |
C.Everyone has his or her own opinion of the world. |
D.You should make yourself look clean and tidy, whatever(无论什么) you wear. |
E.Introduce yourself and start a conversation(对话) about something you have in common. |
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