The days of mine are not all sunny. As a middle school student, I have many problems. On the one hand, I am under great pressure(压力) in my studies, I need to take the exams every month. If I fall behind other students, I will feel that I am not doing well. I always want to be the best, but things can’t go on my way. On the other hand, I don’t want to talk to my parents about my problems. If they ask me questions, I will answer them with few words. I think they won’t understand me. And my body grows fast, changes happen in me, I can’t control my emotion(情绪). What should I do?

Laura

It’s normal to have these problems. But don’t worry. The life is not always wonderful. Everybody has growing pains(痛苦) on their way to the growth. But the time is fair(公平的), gains(收获) are always with pains. Growing pains seem full of knowledge and experience. Although there’s so much homework, so many exams, and so many different ideas between the parents and you, you will learn how to make your dreams come true by working hard and how to understand each other by talking with your parents. Growing pains worry you a lot but they will give you power(力量) and confidence(自信) at the same time. They can help you to be successful and make more friends as well. Successes and friendships can make you happy and enjoyable. Both pains and gains can make your life more colorful. So I think what you need to do is learning to adjust(调节) yourself and get used to these changes. You need to open your heart and have less pressure.

Dr Lee

If you have a good friend who is shy, you should help him or her to overcome shyness. Here are some ideas about how to overcome shyness.

1. Let your friend know you’re there and that you’re going to help her or him.

Letting your friend know what you’re trying to do might make you feel a little embarrassed. But your friend will understand what you do in this way, and she or he knows that you’re only trying to help her or him.

2. Talk to your friend often.

Talking to your friend often can make him or her feel relaxed. You can say “You’re wonderful” or “You look great today”. It is also a way to make her or him feel confident.

3. Avoid saying unhappy things about your shy friend’s personality.

Remember that shyness isn’t a trait (特性) we choose. Do not say bad words about your friend. Never laugh at her or him.

4. Listen to her or him when your friend wants to talk.

When she or he is talking, you shouldn’t interrupt her or him. Just be a quiet listener and listen to her or him carefully. You can reply with a soft voice if necessary.

5. Go out with your friend often.

When you go out, remember to take your shy friend to go with you. You can introduce her or him to new people. Then your shy friend will have a chance to make new friends. In this way, your friend may get over her or his shyness little by little.