Manners

David stood up and smiled at the older lady who was getting on the bus, letting her know that he was giving her his seat. She thanked him and sat down with her grocery bags on the floor in front of her.   

“Thank you, young man,” she said. “Where did you learn such nice manners (礼貌)?”   

“My parents,” said David.

“Well, they taught you well,” said the lady. “What’s your name?”

“David, ma’am.”

“You even say ma’am!” she exclaimed (惊呼). “I’m Mrs. Watson. Pleased to meet you, David.” “Me, too, ma’am,” answered David.

At the next stop, the person next to Mrs. Watson got off the bus. “Here, son,” she said to David. “Have a seat.”

Once David was seated, Mrs. Watson looked at him and asked, “What else did your parents teach you about manners?”

“They taught me about saying ‘yes, ma’am’ and ‘no, sir’—and ‘please’ and ‘thank you’ and ‘you’re welcome’, of course,” answered David. “And they taught me to address (称呼) grown-ups by their last names, like ‘Mr. or Mrs. Smith’.”

“Good,” said Mrs. Watson. Nodding her head in approval (赞同). “Did they teach you about opening doors for other people?”

“Yes, ma’am, they did,” said David. “The other kids look at me funny sometimes when I open doors for them, but I don’t mind. Grown-ups always like it.”

“Well, you keep opening doors for the other kids, David,” said Mrs. Watson. “You’re setting a good example for them.”

The next bus stop was in front of the city library. “This is where I get off,” said David, standing up. “It was nice to meet you.” A young woman came toward the back door, and David walked aside to let her pass.

“This is my stop, too,” said Mrs. Watson. “I live near the library.”

As Mrs. Watson stood to move, she sturnbled (蹒跚) a bit.   

“May I hold your bags while you get off the bus?” asked David, stepping forward to help. “That would be very nice. Thank you, David,” said Mrs. Watson.

How much should a parent be involved in (参与) a child’s life? Actually how a child is raised is a cultural choice. That is, every country or culture seems to have a typical (典型的) way to raise children.

One difference on raising children is at what age and to what extent (程度) they are given freedom outside the home. Parents in Norway believe that it is better for children to learn to be independent from a very early age. Almost all children are sent to daycare at the age of one in Norway. Japan also has similar ideas when it comes to raising independent children. In fact, it would be common for a Japanese child to walk or ride a bike or take a public bus to school alone.

Another difference in child raising is found in how parents guide a child on his or her path (道路) in life. In many Asian cultures, studying begins at a very early age. The idea is that it is never too early to start learning. The parent’s role is to provide the ways for education through private lessons or lessons in school. The goal for them is to raise smart and successful children. However, parents in the Netherlands believe it is not good to push a child too hard in their studies. Instead, the key is more on letting children enjoy childhood and get plenty of rest.

In the end, there doesn’t seem to be a right or wrong way to raise children. One way is not better than another. However, culture and how we are raised affect (影响) who we become. Understanding how we were raised and the values of our culture can help us make sense of our beliefs and views.

Does handwriting matter (要紧)? Not very much, according to many educators. However, scientists say it is far too soon to declare (宣布) handwriting is not important. New evidence (证据) shows that the link (联系) between handwriting and educational development is deep.

Children not only learn to read more quickly when they first learn to write by hand, but they are also better able to create ideas and remember information. In other words, it’s not only what we write that matters—but how.

A study led by Karin James, a psychologist at Indiana University, gave support to that view. A group of children did not learn to read and write. They were offered a letter or a shape on a card and asked to copy it in one of three ways: draw the picture on a page but with a dotted outline (虚线), draw it on a piece of blank white paper, or type it on a computer. Then the researchers put the children in a brain scanner (扫描) and showed them the picture again.

It was found that when children drew a picture freehand (徒手画) without a dotted outline or a computer, the activities in three areas of the brain increased (增加). These three areas work actively in adults when they read and write. Children chose the other two ways and they showed no such result. Dr. James attributes (归咎于) the differences to the process of free handwriting: Not only must we first plan and take action in a way but we are also likely to produce a result that is variable. Those are not necessary when we have an outline.

It’s time for educators to change their minds and pay more attention to children’s handwriting.