"How are you?" is a nice question. It's a friendly way that people in the USA greet each other. But "How are you?" is also a very unusual question. It's a question that often doesn't need an answer. The person who asks "How are you?" hopes to hear the answer "Fine" which isn't really an answer. It is simply another way of saying "Hello" or "Hi".

Sometimes, people also don't say exactly what they mean. For example, when someone asks "Do you agree?" the other people might think, "No, I don't agree. I think you are wrong." But it isn't very polite to disagree so strongly, so the other person might say "I'm not sure." It's a nicer way to say that you don't agree with someone.

People also don't say exactly what they are thinking when they finish talking with other people. For example, many talks over the phone finish when one person says "I've to go now." Often, the person who wants to hang up gives an excuse: "Someone is at the door." "Something is burning on the stove(炉子)." The excuses might be real. Perhaps the person who wants to hang up simply doesn't want to talk any more, but it isn't polite to say that. The excuse is more polite, and it doesn't hurt the other person.

Whether they are greeting each other, taking about an idea, or finishing a talk, people don't say exactly what they are thinking. It's an important way that people try to be nice to each other. It's part of the game of language.

This morning I went out to have breakfast in a small restaurant with a friend. It was a lovely day, but what wasn't so lovely was the woman who took our order. She spoke in a way made the customers unhappy. Her words sounded unfriendly and even kind of rude.

Working in service industry myself, I noticed it. When it came to my turn to get close and order my food, I thought to myself, "What can I do to make her day nice, to touch her to make her smile?” I was watching her and considering what to do.

Surely there must be something that I could compliment her on. It was her voice. She was well spoken and had clear voice. Maybe I would be able to do something to cheer her up.

So after she took my order and gave me the same unfriendly attitude（态度）, I said to her and smiled, "I must say you have the most amazing voice, madam. It is so clear, well-spoken and sounds so professional." I told her honestly that she had one of those voices that would be perfect for announcements or radio.

Hearing my words, her whole face lighted up. She smiled—this was the first time I had seen her do so. As I left and looked back, I noticed that the customer behind me received a different kind of service, a happier one. And it was all because of what I did. It was something so simple!

There was a time when this kind of thing would have embarrassed me, or I'd have been shy and nervous to say such a thing. Now I must say the words. Why? Because I have the power—the power to completely change someone's day by something as simple as a few kind words and being kind! And you have this power, too.

As I grow up, I know that life plays a very important role( 角色 ) in my education I really wanted to achieve. What I mean is that life can teach you things no one else can. Luckily for you, it’s time to have lessons of life. Pay attention and you can know what I call the school of life.

Use your head

You have to be smart to survive in this world. Anytime you need to make a move, stop and think. Obviously there will be times when you need to take action first, but if you’ve been taking the time to plan, you’ll always make the right choice. Fail to plan, plan to fail.

Set your goals

In my team, if you don’t finish the job well, we will fire you. Your goals should be on building a basic of solid and complete work. Make certain a list of what you have to do and start with the biggest and most difficult task. The key here is goals.

Respect your superiors( 上级 )

Your boss is in his position for a reason, no matter what you think of him. If he’s not the best one, be patient—he’ll be out of there soon. In the meantime, you have to respect him as your superior. That means following orders and closing your mouth. If you don’t respect your boss, how will you expect the people under you to do the same?

Keep your cool

You should never let your emotions( 情绪 ) control you. You should learn to keep calm. Never lose your cool when dealing in business, or it will ruin the whole thing.

The school of life can be hard, but if you’re smart and play your cards right, you can come out with an A+.   Just treat every situation as a learning experience. I hope you’ve studied.