A star athlete at the college where I work recently stopped by my office. After committing a few unforced errors during a weekend match, she suffered severely by self-criticism.

This student, like many I teach, strongly believes she should be able to control the outcomes of her life by virtue of her hard work. In her mind, “Nothing can stop me but myself”. So when these students fall short of what they imagine they should accomplish, they are filled with self-blame, reasoning, “If my accomplishments are mine to control, my failures must be entirely my faults, too”, which makes it extremely difficult for them to move on.

We often owe young adults struggling with failure to their parents’ overprotection of them from discomfort. But there is another factor at play: a message transmitted by indulging ( 纵容的 ) parents who have falsely promised them that they can achieve anything if they are willing to work for it. However, the cruel reality of life is that you can do everything in your power—and still fail. Then what should be done to help?

Psychologists Luthar and Kumar urge parents and teachers to spend time helping students find purpose, or goals they genuinely love to pursue and that make an impact on the world, which may help them gain greater life satisfaction and become more psychologically mature. Besides, instead of allowing our kids to beat themselves up when things don’t go their way, we might all question a culture where one is considered lazy without full devotion. The point is to remind them that life has a way of sucker-punching ( 出其不意) us when we least expect it. It’s often the people who learn to say “stuff happens” who get up the fastest.

Nowadays, handwriting seems to become less necessary, for young children learn to tap and touch screens before they have even learned to pick up a pencil or tie their shoelaces. Most of our written communication is done through texting on mobile phones or typing on a keyboard. And voice recognition softwares are becoming more and more advanced —making even keyboards unnecessary!

So, are handwriting skills important to your child? Actually, handwriting is an exercise in eye-hand coordination (协调), an important part of visual-motor (视觉运动) skills, which are connected with achievements in study. Scientists found that developing fine visual-motor skills in early childhood can lead to not only writing success, but better performance in reading and math in elementary school. It was also found that kids who fail to write neatly and efficiently are often accused of being lazy, and this may affect their behavior and self-worth. Moreover, a study showed that when a group of children were asked to come up with ideas for an article, the ones with better handwriting were more active and had quicker minds. In some ways, handwriting helps their brains’ development.

The first attempts at writing can be challenging for pre-school children —whose fine motor skills are not yet fully developed. But some skills to prepare for handwriting are simple to build at home and in preschool. Parents should provide lots of opportunities for kids to copy and draw shapes and simple pictures in early childhood before letters are introduced. Let your child copy your shapes in sand, or with chalks on a board before trying to draw the shapes on their own. Encourage your child to spend less time on electronic devices and more time on activities to improve eye-hand coordination.

Let’s face it —technology is certain to continue developing and more research is needed to find the best ways to teach handwriting to young children. But, there’s plenty of evidence that the handwriting practice can provide young children with a good start in developing skills needed for a healthy and successful journey in school.

Men have long been puzzled by the amount women pack, when they go on holiday. They despair as they watch their beloved spend much money on extra baggage charge. Nearly half of these women admitted to lying about the weight of their case to their partner before leaving for the airport, in fear of being made to unload some unnecessary items.

But it's a fact that women pack more than they need. On average, a woman needs around 57 items in suitcase for a two-week holiday, yet most women pack nearer to 150 items, ranging from skirts, tops, underwear and high heels. In addition, women pack more sun cream, make-up and hair appliances than they are likely to need. They all take up space in the suitcase, only a third of them will see the light of day once at the holiday place.

79 percent of women admitted to taking extra items with them, with the reason for this being ''just in case''. Women plan their holiday wardrobe months in advance. Packing enough clothes and other items to last a month is not enough for some women. They'd take a chance to shop for new items while holidaying abroad. So they'll return with even more luggage in their cases.

Professor Karen Pine said, ''Women are tempted to take familiar items with them on holiday, often everything except the kitchen sink. Some people find traveling stressful, particularly when they're unsure about the home comforts available at their holiday place. They over- pack to help cope with those feelings of stress and reduce the uncertainty. ''

This will come as no surprise to some men, who are used to trying to squeeze their partner's luggage into the boot of the car with their own, smaller case. On the other hand, men pack very lightly, with only an average of 40 items for a two-week holiday.