Kenyon Scudder once told me a story about his friend, Michael. Michael happened to be on a train sitting next to a young man who seemed worried. Finally the young man told the friend that he was a convict (罪犯) returning home from a prison for away. What he did had brought shame on his family, and they had neither visited him nor written to him. He hoped, however, that this was only because they were too poor to travel and too busy to write.

When he was set free he had written to tell them he wanted to go home. To make matters easy for them, however, he had asked them to put up a signal (信号) for him when the train passed their little form. If the family had forgiven (原谅) him, they were to put up a white ribbon (丝带) in the big apple tree near the railway. If they didn’t want him back, they were to do nothing, and he would stay on the train, and go far away.

As the train neared his hometown, his suspense became so great that he was afraid to look out of the window. He asked Michael to watch for the big apple tree. They changed seats. In a minute, Michael put his hand on the young convict’s shoulder. “There it is,” he said, his eyes filled with sudden tears. “It’s all right. The whole tree is white with ribbons.”

It feels like every time my mother and I start to have a conversation, it turns into an argument. We talk about something as simple as dinner plans and suddenly, my mother will push the conversation into World War III. She’ll talk about my lack of a bright future because I don’t plan to be a doctor. And much to her disappointment, I don’t want to do any job related to science, either. In fact, when I was pushed to say that I planned to major(主修) in English and communications, she nearly had a heart attack.

“Why can’t you be like my co-worker’s son?” she bemoans all the time. Her co-worker’s son received a four-year scholarship and is now earning 70,000 dollars a year as an engineer. I don’t know what to answer except that I simply can’t be like Mr. Perfect as I’ve called the unnamed co-worker’s son. I can’t be like him. I’m the type of person who loves to help out in the community, write until the sun goes down, and most of all, wants to achieve a career because I love it, not because of fame (名声) or salary.

I understand why my mother is worried about my future major. I’ve seen my mother struggle to raise me on her small salary and work long hours. She leaves the house around 6:30 am and usually comes home around 5 pm or even 6 pm. However, I want her to know that by becoming a doctor, it doesn’t mean I’ll be successful. I’d rather follow my dreams and create my own future.

How to Bring Family Closer

Strong family bonds (纽带) can encourage better behaviors in children and teach them how to be a good friend.【小题1】

Set aside time for family.【小题2】By keeping this day on a regular schedule, everyone will know that they need to keep that day clear for family time. Then the entire family can get together for a fun activity.

Eat meals together. Choose a few nights during the week when you expect everyone to gather around the dinner table. Studies have shown that eating meals together has a positive effect on children’s physical and mental well-being.【小题3】Don’t allow phones. What’s the most important is that you come together and enjoy a meal free of distraction (分心).

【小题4】Make cleaning your home a responsibility for the whole family. Create a list of housework and have everyone sign up. Then set up a time during the week or on the weekend when everyone can do their housework together.

Encourage support. Feeling supported by your family is one of the most important things in building strong family bonds. Bonds like these will last your kids a lifetime. They will enjoy these strong bonds when they are your age and even after you are gone.【小题5】