How to Teach Kids About Emotions (情绪) and Feelings

By teaching kids about their feelings and emotions, it opens up a whole new world for them. It’s like Helen Keller. In the movie Helen Keller, there’s an amazing scene where she learns that water has a name. Her world completely opened up. 【小题1】

Teach songs that talk about feelings

You probably know this one already—maybe even sang it yourself as a child or to your child, but there’s a great song called If You’re Happy and You Know It! 【小题2】

Explain other people’s emotions

Children are ego-centric (以自我为中心). 【小题3】 This is not selfishness. Young children are unable to understand different views. Use proper chances to explain how other people feel.

Use pictures or emojis (表情符号)

Another great way to teach children about feelings and emotions is to use pictures and emojis. I recall that on one of my visits to the hospital. I noticed different little emoji faces on a board from which a patient could choose to express their pain level. 【小题4】 When they’re feeling something that you recognize, you can show them emojis and ask, “Which feeling are you having now?”

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Your children are watching you all the time. They’re like a camera. They pay very close attention. So, if your child sees you throw your phone across the room after a heated conversation, it’s noted.

It is not only praise or punishment that determines a child’s level of cognition (认知). There are some other important ways we shape our kids—particularly by giving instructions and commands in a negative or positive choice of words. For example, we can say to a child “Don’t run into traffic!” or “Stay on the footpath close to me.” In using the latter, you will be helping your kids to think and act positively, and to feel competent in a wide range of situations, because they know what to do, and aren’t scaring themselves with what not to do.

Actually, it is all in the way the human mind works. When we think, we automatically practise. For example, if someone offered you a million dollars not to think of a blue monkey for two minutes, you wouldn’t be able to do it. When a child is told “Don’t fall off the tree,” he will think of two things: “don’t” and “fall off the tree”. That is, he will automatically create the picture of falling off the tree in his mind. A child who is vividly imagining falling off the tree is much more likely to fall off. So it is far better to use “Hold on to the tree carefully.”

Clear, positive instructions help kids to understand the right way to do things. Kids do not always know how to be safe, or how to react to the warning of the danger in negative words. So parents should make their commands positive. “Sam, hold on firmly to the side of the boat” is much more useful than “Don’t you dare to fall out of the boat?” or “How do you think I’ll feel if you drown?” The changes are small but the difference is obvious.

Children learn how to guide and organize themselves from the way we instruct them with our words, so it pays to be positive.

When a child is told he is “uncool”, it can be very painful. He may say he doesn’t care, and even act in ways that are opposite of cool on purpose. But these are simple ways to handle sadness by pretending it’s not there.

Helping a child feel better in school had to be careful. If you say, “Why are you worried about what other children think about you? It doesn’t matter!” Children know that it does matter. Instead, an active way may be best. You could say, “I’m going to do a couple of things for you to help you feel better in school.”

If a boy is having trouble making friends, the teacher can help him. The teacher can arrange things so that he has chances to use his abilities to contribute to class projects. This is how the other children learn how to value his good qualities and to like him. A teacher can also raise a child’s popularity in the group by showing that he values that child. It even helps to put him in a seat next to a very popular child, or let him be a partner with that child in activities, etc.

There are things that parents can do at home, too. Be friendly when your child brings others home to play. Encourage him to invite friends to meals and then serve the dishes they consider “super”. When you plan trips, picnics, movies, and other shows, invite another child with whom your child wants to be friends.

What you can do is to give him a chance to join a group that may be shutting him out. Then, if he has good qualities, he can start to build real friendship of his own.