You have probably heard the saying, “When life gives you lemons, make lemonade (柠檬水).” Since lemons are considered bitter and lemonade is considered sweet, the saying tells you to make the best out of a bad situation.

Unluckily, when something bad happens, it’s not uncommon for most people to talk about it to anyone who’ll listen, and complain about life. “Why me?” That’s like getting a bag of lemons and thinking, “Lemons taste bad! I’d rather have chocolate!” If you don’t make anything with the lemons, they will go bad. But what if you did something with them? What if you made lemonade? Isn’t it possible to do something similar with a bad situation?

Here’s an example. You’re about to go to the cinema when you discover you have a flat tire (瘪胎). You consider this a terrible thing for you are really looking forward to enjoying the movie. Now you’re very upset, hating the tire, the car, and your life. But what if you called AAA (美国汽车协会) and got your tire fixed? What if you did some reading, or had coffee with a friend instead? A bad experience can be turned into something positive. Almost anything can work itself out into something better. You can’t change what has happened, so make the best of it. I’m not saying it will be easy. The easy thing to do is complain about your bad situation and not consider what it could be turned into.

Next time when something unfortunate happens, stop and think, “How can I turn this around? How can I make it a positive experience?”

An obstacle usually refers to a difficulty or problem that prevents you from achieving something. Whether it was in your past, or you’re presently facing an obstacle, you have to resolve it. Some people avoid obstacles or deny their existence. Others let obstacles control them, and they feel defeated. Your attitude towards obstacles will define the outcome of whether you rise from the challenge, or remain stuck in it. Here are some more great things to love about obstacles.

First, obstacles give you purposes. Sometimes obstacles can reset your goals. You might have always had a particular way of doing things, or wanted to pursue certain goals; but when you’re faced with setbacks or difficulties, you’re forced to re-think, and re-examine your path. You may end up focusing on something new and exciting. Or, you may concentrate on something that you otherwise wouldn’t have if not for the particular setback. By having to overcome an obstacle, you’ll be fulfilling a purpose, rather than just going through the motions. Second, obstacles prepare you for the unexpected. Obstacles serve as guides for where to go next. Even though obstacles can bring out many negative emotions in us, such as frustration, anger, or sadness, it’s important to realize that they don’t stop you from reaching your intended goals. Instead, they, in a way, give you time to stop and think if perhaps there is a new and better path to take and what you can prepare for what will happen along the way. Obstacles shift your perspective.

Obstacles whether you like them or not are unavoidable. Life will never stop throwing you new obstacles. So, the best thing to do is know how to better see and address these obstacles, and transform them into opportunities for self-improvement. The more you’re able to see obstacles as being an advantage to your life, the better you’ll be at managing them.

Accepting obstacles will be rewarding. It will make you constantly change and adapt to new situations, allowing you to grow into a better version of yourself.

It was a few years ago. A friend sent me a restaurant gift card for Christmas and I picked a pretty, sunny Sunday afternoon to use it. It felt good taking my two grown sons and daughter to a nice sit-down restaurant instead of the fast food places we usually ate at. The meal was delicious and we all had a good time. When the waitress brought the check, I looked down at it. The gift card covered almost all of it. I reached into my wallet to get enough cash to cover the rest. I saw two bills in my wallet. The first would cover the rest of the bill and give the waitress a nice tip. The second bill was much larger, so I reached down to pick out the first one.

At that moment, my mind flashed back to 30 years ago. I was working as a waiter in a restaurant much like the one we were in now. It was long hours of hard work for low pay. I went home just only making enough to feed my young family. I also remembered how more than once I saw the waitresses counting their meager tips while worrying about how they were going to pay the rent and buy their kids things they needed. I remembered the pain in their eyes and sadness in their faces at the end of the day.

I blinked (眨眼) and was back in the present again. My fingers touched the smaller bill in my wallet. I smiled, pushed it back down, and picked out the much larger bill. I folded it around the gift card and covered both of them with the check. As we all got up from the table, I handed them to the hard-working waitress. “You keep the change,” I said with a smile and a happy heart.

We are all one family in this world. We live together, laugh together, and suffer together. Do your best to be a good person and love others. Replace the suffering with joy.