You may have grown up living with lots of siblings, or this may be your first time sharing your living space with someone else. 【小题1】 Follow these tips to make sure you and your roommate keep things pleasant and supportive throughout the year (or even years)!

Be clear about your expectations from the beginning. Do you know in advance that you hate it when someone hits the snooze button (贪睡闹铃) fifteen times every morning? That you’re a neat freak (怪人)? That you need ten minutes to yourself before talking to anyone after you wake up? 【小题2】 It’s not fair to expect him or her to pick up on them right away, and communicating what you need is one of the best ways to avoid problems before they become problems.

Address problems when they’re little. Is your roommate always forgetting her things for the shower, and taking yours? 【小题3】 Addressing things that annoy you while they’re still little can help your roommate be aware of something she may not otherwise know. And addressing little things is much easier than addressing them after they’ve become big.

【小题4】 This may seem simple, but it’s probably one of the biggest reasons why roommates experience conflict. Don’t think he’ll mind if you borrow his shoes for a quick soccer game? For all you know, you just stepped over an uncrossable line. Don’t borrow, use, or take anything without getting permission first.

Be mindful of who you bring into your room-and how often. 【小题5】 But your roommate may not. Be mindful of how often you bring people over. If your roommate studies best in the quiet, and you study best in a group, can you alternate who hits the library and who gets the room?

Living with other people can be difficult, especially when each person has their own ideas about how they want to live. 【小题1】. Taking a few simple steps will help you share your living space harmoniously.

【小题2】. This applies to finances, food, possessions, use of common areas, loud activities or parties, quiet hours, and so on.

Make a plan to divide up responsibilities and chores（家常杂务）between you and your roommate. For example, if your roommate is a good cook and you are not, 【小题3】. It may also be a good idea to set up a chores schedule, where you will take turns cleaning the bathroom, raking out the trash and so on.

Not everyone has the same ideas about day to day living as you do. Take your roommate’s feelings into consideration. For instance, if you are dying to throw a party on Thursday night but your roommate has a final early the next morning, agree to postpone the party till Friday evening, instead.

Communication is key in making the relationship work. If a problem comes up, it’s better to talk about it right away than to ignore it. For example, say “Chris, it upsets me when I wake up to find all the milk gone. If you use the last of something, can you please add it to the list?” If you simply cannot communicate openly and there is tension all the time, 【小题5】.

Life is filled with challenges. As we get older, we come to realize that those challenges are the very things that shape us and make us who we are. It is the same with the challenges that come with friendship. When we are faced with a challenge, we usually have two choices. We can try to accept it, or we can decide that the thing isn’t worth the trouble and call it quits. Although there are certainly times when calling it quits is the right thing to do, in most cases what we need are commitment(投入) and communication.  

When we are committed to something, it means that no matter how painful or how uncomfortable it is, we will always choose to face it instead of running away from it. Communication is making space for discussion and talking about how you feel instead of just saying what others did wrong. If you can say to a friend “I got my feelings hurt.” rather than “You hurt my feelings.”, you are going to be able to solve the problem much faster.

When dealing with many challenges that friendship will bring to you, try to see them for what they are: small hurdles(障碍) you need to jump or get through on your way through life. Nothing is so big that it is impossible to get over, and hurt only serves to make us stronger. It’s all part of growing up. It happens to everyone, and some day you will look back on all of this and say, “Hard as it was, it made me who I am today. And that is a benefit.”