Young children who have experienced compassionate (有同情心的) love and empathy (认同感) from their mothers may be more willing to turn thoughts into action by being generous to others, a University of California, Davis’ study suggests.

In lab studies, children tested at ages 4 and 6 showed more willingness to give up the tokens (代金券) they had earned to fictional children in need when two conditions were present—if they showed bodily changes when given the opportunity to share and had experienced positive parenting that modeled such kindness. The study initially included 74 preschool-age children and their mothers. They were invited back two years later, resulting in 54 mother-child pairs whose behaviors and reactions were analyzed when the children were 6.

“At both ages, children with better physiological regulation and with mothers who expressed stronger compassionate love were likely to donate more of their earnings,” said Paul Hastings, UC Davis professor of psychology. “Compassionate mothers likely develop emotionally close relationships with their children while also providing an early example of satisfying the needs of others,” researchers said in the study, published in November in Frontiers in Psychology” Emotion Science.

In each lab exercise, after attaching a monitor to record children’s heart-rate activity, the examiner told the children they would be earning tokens for a variety of activities, and that the tokens could be turned in for a prize. The tokens were put into a box, and each child eventually earned 20 prize tokens. Then before the session ended, children were told they could donate all or part of their tokens to other children.

Taken together, the findings showed that children’s generosity is supported by the combination of their socialization experiences—their mothers’ compassionate love—and their physiological regulation, and that these work like “internal and external supports for the ability to act prosocially that build on each other”.

In addition to observing the children’s propensity (习性) to donate their game earnings, Hastings suggested that “being in a calmer state after sharing could reinforce (加强) the generous behavior that produced that good feeling.”

Today’s world is not an easy adjustment for young adults. A key skill set for success is persistence(毅力) characteristic that researchers say is heavily influenced by fathers. Researchers from Brigham Young University discovered that fathers are in a unique position to help their adolescent children learn persistence.

Much information can be clearly conveyed, purely through our eyes, so the expression “eyes also talk” is often heard.

Can you recall any experience that further proves this statement? On a bus you may quickly glance at a stranger, but not make eye contact. If he senses that he is being stared at, he may feel uncomfortable.

It is the same in daily life. If you are looked at for more than necessary, you will look at yourself up and down to see if there is anything wrong with you. If nothing goes wrong, you will feel angry about other’s stare at you that way. Eyes do speak, right?

Looking too long at someone may seem to be rude and aggressive. But things are different when it comes to staring at the opposite sex. If a man looks at a woman for more than 10 seconds and refuses to avert his gaze, his intentions are obvious. That is, he wishes to attract her attention, to make her understand that he is admiring her.

However, the normal eye contact for two people engaged in conversation is that the speaker will only look at the listener from time to time, in order to make sure that the listener does pay attention to what the former is speaking, to tell him that he is attentive.

If a speaker looks at you continuously when speaking, as if he tries to dominate you, you will feel disconcerted. A poor liar usually exposes himself by looking too long at the victim, since he believes the false idea that to look straight in the eye is a sign of honest communication.

In fact, continuous eye contact is confined to lovers only, who will enjoy looking at each other tenderly for a long time, to show affection that words cannot express.

Evidently, eye contact should be done according to the relationship between two people and specific situation.