Living and dealing with kids can be a tough job these days, but living and dealing with parents can be even tougher.

If I have learned anything in my 16 years, it is that communication is very important, both when you disagree and when you get along. With any relationship, you need to let the other person know how you are feeling. If you are not able to communicate, your relationship drifts apart. When you are mad at your parents or anyone else, not talking to them doesn’t solve anything．

Communication begins with the concerns of another. It means that you can’t just come home from school, go up to your room and talk to nobody. Even if you just say “Hi” and see how their day is for five minutes, it is better than nothing. If you look up the word “communication” in the dictionary, it will say “the exchange of ideas, conveyance (传递) of information, correspondence (通信), means of communication; a letter or message”. To keep a good relationship, you must keep the communication strong. Let people know how you feel, even if it’s just by writing a note. When dealing with parents, you always have to make them feel good about how they are doing as parents. If you are trying to make them see something as you see it, tell them that you listen to what they have to say, but ask them politely to listen to you. Shouting or walking away only makes the situation worse.

Here is an example. One night, Sophie went to a street party with her friends. She knew she had to be home by midnight after the fireworks. but they didn’t feel she could just ask to go home. That would be rude. After all, they had been nice enough to take her along with them. Needless to say, she was late getting home. Her parents were mad at first, but when Sophie explained why she was late, they weren’t as mad and let the incident go. Communication was the key factor here. If Sophie’s parents had not been willing to listen, Sophie would have been in a lot of trouble.

Communication isn’t a one-way deal. It goes both ways. Just remember: if you get into a situation like Sophie’s, telling the other person how you feel and listening are key factors to communication．

Today's world is not an easy adjustment for young adults. Key skill set for success is persistence (毅力), a characteristic that researchers say is heavily influenced by fathers. Researchers from Brigham Young University discovered that fathers are in a unique position to help their adolescent children learn persistence.

BYU professors Laura Padilla-Walker and Randal Day arrived at these findings after following 325 American families over several years. And over time，the persistence gained through fathers led to higher achievement in school.

"There are relatively few studies that stress the unique role of fathers，"Padilla-Walker said. "This research also helps to prove that characteristics such as persistence-which can be taught-are key to a child's life success.”

Researchers determined that dads need to practice an "authoritative" parenting style. Authoritative parenting is not authoritarian:rigid，demanding or controlling. Rather，an authoritative parenting style includes some of the following characteristics:children feel warmth and love from their father；responsibility and the reasons behind rules are stressed children are given an appropriate level of autonomy(自主权).

In the study，about 52 percent of the dads exhibited above-average levels of authoritative parenting. A key finding is that over time，children raised by an authoritative father were significantly more likely to develop persistence，which leads to better outcomes in school.

This particular study examined 11 to 14-year-olds living in two-parent homes. Yet the researchers suggest that single parents still may play a role in teaching the benefits of persistence，which is an avenue of future research.

Lucy Flores’ father, Luciano Flores, grew up in Mexico and moved his family to the United States when Lucy was only three years old. Her father, who speaks Spanish, shared that his family had few resources, just like the school he attended. He stopped going to school after the first grade and started working to provide for his family.

In spite of this, Lucy did well in school and became the first person in her family to graduate from college. After that, she took up a job of teaching preschool students how to read letters and write their names. “I was thinking to myself, since I’m able to teach these children how to read and write, why am I not doing the same for my own father?” Then she started teaching her father to read and write.

After four months of working together, Lucy’s father can now write a lot of words and is reading some books on his own. As she taught her dad, Lucy shared their journey by posting videos on TikTok. “I don’t know if he understands how many people are watching him and following him,” said Lucy. “But I took it as a chance to encourage him.” Followers on TikTok share lesson plan ideas and have sent school supplies and books to the family.

Apart from watching her dad’s progress and inspiring others to never give up on their dreams, the most satisfying part for Lucy of teaching her dad has been the change in the family atmosphere (气氛). “In the past, we did not get along as my dad was quiet and not someone who liked to share his feelings or sit down and play with me when I was a kid,” said Lucy. Luciano said because of his daughter, he’s excited to continue to focus on learning letters and numbers and to spend time with his family.