The act of making and being a friend is as simple as it is difficult. We spoke with experts to help find ways to make new friends, as well as to take better care of the friendships you already have. Here are few of their opinions.

Accept the awkwardness (尴尬) and assume that other people need new friends, too

When you reach out to somebody you don’t know well — whether that’s sending the first text message or making small talk in the elevator — you often feel uncomfortable. 【小题1】. Otherwise you can’t have new friends.

Remember that people will like you more than you think they will

This opinion is based on science called the “liking gap”, which says that the little voice in your head telling you that somebody didn’t like you very much is wrong. 【小题2】. Instead, when you talk to someone else, you’re actually going to brighten their day.

Engage in activities that you love

Ask anyone about how to make friends and they will most likely tell you to try a new hobby. It might sound hollow. 【小题3】.

Doing things you are actually interested in will naturally draw people to you because you’ll be in the right place with the right people. 【小题4】, remind yourself that you love more than one thing.

【小题5】

The planet is warming, our news updates are constant, and there’s so much good television out there to watch. We get it. But if you want to keep your friendships alive, you have to be present for them. Listen to and notice things about your friends.

How much time do you spend doing the research before you make a big decision? The answer for many of us, it turns out, is hardly any. When picking a doctor, for instance, many individuals simply use recommendations from friends and family rather than consulting medical professionals or sources such as healthcare websites or articles on good physicians.

While there are people who go over every detail before making a choice, a fair number of individuals are quick to jump to conclusions. Psychologists call this way of thinking a cognitive bias (认知偏差), a tendency toward a specific mental mistake.

It has been found that hasty (仓促的) judgments often lead to errors in behavior and thinking. Jumpers made more errors than nonjumpers on problems that require thoughtful analysis. Consider this brainteaser: “A baseball bat and ball cost $1.10 together. The bat costs $1 more than the ball. How much does the ball cost?” Many people jumped to the conclusion of 10 cents, but a little thought reveals the right answer to be five cents.

So what is behind jumping? Psychological researchers commonly distinguish between two pathways of thought: automatic, known as system 1, which reflects ideas that come to the mind easily and without effort; and controlled, or system 2, comprising intentional and effortful reasoning that is analytical and mindful. Jumpers and nonjumpers are equally influenced by automatic thoughts. The jumpers, however, do not adopt controlled reasoning to the same degree as nonjumpers.

It is system 2 thinking that helps people counterbalance (抵消) mental biases introduced by the more knee-jerk (本能地做出的) system 1. To put it another way, jumpers were more likely to accept the conclusions they made at first glance without thorough examination or questioning. A lack of system 2 thinking was also more broadly connected to their problematic beliefs and faulty reasoning. Happily, there may be some hope for jumpers: it is suggested that using training to target their biases can help people think more meticulously.

Ways to Raise a Physically Confident Kid

Physical confidence can mean better mental and Physical health, Kids who are confident in bodies are comfortable with different kinds of sports and other physical activities and willing to try new things and take on new challenges.【小题1】Here are ways to promote your child's physical confidence.

Be a role model.

It's all about "monkey see, monkey do."【小题2】Whether it's an adventure together or trying a sport for the first time, and show them how you stick with it, even when it's hard. Avoid making excuses, like "I'm too old/ weak/fat to try that."

Let kids make mistakes.

Parents should introduce the value that we can all learn from our mistakes, and then let them go. One way to do this is to ask children what they've failed at that day.【小题3】

Support risk-taking.

【小题4】Don't worry it's climbing high up in a tree or teaching himself skateboard. Free play and risk-taking are awesome opportunities for kids to solve their own problems. And when they can do that, they feel proud of themselves—as well they should!

【小题5】

Small goals that are measurable and objective, but not dependent on points or wins. Remind them not to be so critical of themselves, and focus on getting better than they were the day before. They can do this by focusing on small wins and determined to improve their physical skills outside of an organized practice.

If your child is naturally timid, don't worry. Take small steps and offer support. You'll get there—and you'll both be stronger after the journey you take together.