My dad passed away yesterday and I am processing everything. It's hard to try and find positivity in my pain, but my Dad taught me so much when he was healthy, and when he wasn't, I wanted to share some of the lessons.

Be on the phone less. This one seems strange but in his final moments I was all in, no checking my phone because it really didn't matter.【小题1】This was a moment I needed to remember and I would have regretted it if I was distracted in this part of his journey.

【小题2】Sometimes we need people to lean on My mom and dad needed a lot of help. I needed a lot of help. We were surrounded by people willing to help us and instead of shutting them out like we've done in the past, we let them in and it was exactly what we needed.

Not everyone will understand your experience.【小题3】Just knowing people are here for us means a lot, but I also know that no one will fully understand my experience and that's okay as we are all different.

There's nothing more important than being with the ones you love. I was able to hold my Dad when he took his last breath. My mom and I made sure that my dad knew he was loved through this journey.【小题5】Everything else is secondary.

As a teacher for a decade, I find that college kids want to carve their routes and live out their journeys. But so many of them don’t know what they want to do—what major to choose? What career to pursue? What topic to write their papers on? More importantly, they wonder why any of these things really matters.

One of the best books I have read is Dr. Meg Jay’s The Defining Decade. Basically, Dr. Meg Jay explains one’s 20s have an enormous effect across years and even generations to come, in terms of careers, families, friends, and relationships. She states that our brain completes the second and last growth peak in our 20s as it rewires itself for true adulthood.

From the time we are in primary school, people ask us what we want to be when we grow up. I once asked my friend’s eight-year-old the question and she said, “I’m just a kid; I have no way of knowing what I want to be when I’m an adult.” Maybe the questions should be: What means something to you? What makes you happy? What do you care about regardless of any rewards? This train of thought may benefit all.

In a world of easy access, today’s students can find everything they need after a few clicks on the Internet. Sure, that’s great, quick and convenient. But there is something important missed in the hunt persistence(坚持), patience, and concentration. So I’m grateful that when I was in college, I still had to visit the library to find the resources I needed to write a research paper. During this process, I reflected on what truly made me happy and what I genuinely cared about.

My friend Brandon recently told me that he often woke up in the early morning and realized things he cared about were not what he devoted his life to, because he took the way that others considered good when he was in his 20s, instead of the way that was right for him. What you want to be when you grow up is something that may change throughout your life, but it’s likely that your passion and motivation will always come along.