Conflict often arises between parents and young adults. It is important to work on achieving healthy communication with your parents.

Make time to have meaningful conversations. The newer generation often contact others through technology, such as text messages, online chats or email. They have much less face-to-face contact 【小题1】, most still prefer a personal conversation or phone call. Take the time to sit down and have a few minutes of conversation with them every day.

【小题2】. If an issue is important to you, bring it up to your parents. Hiding emotions or annoyance can deteriorate(恶化) the relationship that you have with them. Always communicate your feelings in a calm and neutral tone. Avoid getting trapped in the blame game. Allow time for them to respond and share how they feel.

Use the PEN (pause, empathy, needs) method with your parents. 【小题3】. If a certain conversation with your parents is taking a turn for the worse, start by taking a pause. Listen to your parents' needs or wants and empathize with them. Inform them that you also have your own needs and wants. 【小题4】 and ask them to empathize with you as well.

Don't just talk about the difficult stuff. Talk to your parents about your everyday life and funny experiences. 【小题5】. Most of your conversations with your parents should be relaxed and humorous. You don't want to talk to them only when you are faced with an issue. Regular communication about the less important things will make the difficult conversations much easier.

My daughter was being thrown out of the sixth grade. The teacher said to me, “She may not be up to what we’re trying to accomplish.” He was really saying she didn’t have the intelligence. I got mad because I knew she was smart, just as my father had known I was smart when I was failing in school. We had her tested and found that the troubles my daughter was having were the same as those I had had. I decided to get tested as well. She was dyslexic, and so was I. By then I was a successful television writer and producer. I’d won an Emmy for “The Rockford Files.”

Had I known earlier, though, that there was a reason beyond my control to explain why I was a low achiever, I may not have worked so hard in my late 20s and early 30s. I was writing and writing. I was working for no other reason than to hear people praise me.

I needed that praise because I was carrying around the failure in studies. I did badly in all my courses.

I once asked a friend who had always gotten an A, “How long did you study for this?” He said, “I didn’t. I just glanced at it.” So what do I take from that? He must be smarter than I am. I began to ask, “What will happen to me when I’m not good at anything?” Despite my doubts, I did become successful, and people now say to me, “So you’ve overcome dyslexia.”

No. You don’t overcome it, you learn to compensate for it. Some easy things are very hard for me. Most people who go through college read at least twice as fast as I do. I avoid dialing a phone if I can, because I sometimes have to try three times to get the number right. I get that recording “The number you have reached is not in service” more than any man on earth.

Despite my weaknesses I view dyslexia as a gift, not a curse (诅咒). Many dyslexics are good at right- brain, abstract thought, and that’s what my kind of creative writing is. And I can write quickly— I go like wind — and can get up to 15 pages a day. Writing is not the problem. That’s my strength.

The real fear I have for dyslexic is not that they have to struggle with regular school studies, but that they will quit on themselves before they get out of school. Parents have to create victories whenever they can, whether it’s music, sports or art. You can make your dyslexic child able to say, “Yeah, reading’s hard. But I have these other things I can do.”

"Her grades are fine； I'm not worried about that， but she just doesn't seem to love learning any more，"

Alice's mum said．

She's absolutely right． I'd noticed the same thing about her daughter over the previous two or three years when I'd been Alice's middle school teacher， and I have an answer， right there on the tip of my tongue， to what has gone wrong． Yet I'm torn between my responsibility to help Alice and the knowledge that what I have to say is a truth I'm not sure this mother is ready to hear．

The truth for this parent and so many others is this： Her child has sacrificed her natural curiosity and love of learning at the altar of achievement， and it's our fault． Alice's parents， her teachers， society at large - we are all supposed to be blamed in this crime against learning． From her first day of school， we pointed her toward that altar and trained her to measure her progress by means of points， scores， and awards．

We taught Alice that her potential is tied to her intellect（智力）， and that her intellect is more important than her character． We taught her to come home proudly bearing grade As， championship prizes， and college acceptance， and not on purpose， we taught her that we don't really care how she obtains them． We taught her to protect her academic and extracurricular（课外的）perfection at all costs and that it's better to quit when things get challenging rather than risk losing that perfect record． Above all else， we taught her to fear failure． That fear is what has destroyed her love of learning．