Once I failed my comprehensive exam at university. Suddenly, I felt I was a_________. For the first time, I felt completely out of control. I started to go on a(n)_________to deal with my stress and anxiety that_________my desire for perfection.

What began as a seemingly_________“lifestyle change” turned into an eating disorder. I spent more time_________rice, cakes and other foods than studying. To eat “_________” meals at home, I often turned down social gatherings.

Over 9 months, as my stress and anxiety_________, I ate smaller and smaller dishes and denied (拒绝给予) my_________the food it needed. Sometimes I would almost_________upon standing and I became a walking skeleton (骨瘦如柴的人).

My family and adviser asked whether I was OK and__________time away from my lab, but my brain made excuses for how I was feeling and behaving. I__________believed I was making myself better.

I didn’t put a name to the__________until I came across an article about disordered eating. I finally sought the help of a(n)__________. He told me that my eating disorder had__________to do with food, exercise, or weight.__________, it was about my desire to be exceptional. Through weekly sessions, I unpacked 25 years of needing to be__________. I learned tools to acknowledge and process my feelings, not by means of__________calories.

Now, having been on the road to__________for one year and a half, I enter my final year of graduate school with a completely__________mindset about the person I want — rather than need — to be. Yes, I still want to__________. But I don’t want to seek perfection.