Shakespeare once wrote: “Neither a borrower nor A lender be;For loan (借款) often loses both itself and friend”. It’s often explained and used as a warning about the dangers of lending, and how you could risk a friendship through it. But why can lending money be so detrimental to our friendships?
If our friend or family member comes to us for hard cash, it can be very difficult to turn them away. You feel under pressure to help. And if that money doesn’t come back, it can lead to fights or even legal battles. So how can we, as the lender, avoid these problems? According to Bradley T. Klontz, an expert in financial psychology (心理学), there are some steps you can take.
Understanding why there is an unavoidable risk to lending anything to a friend is the first thing. And it’s not just the risk of losing the money, but the friendship could also be in danger. This is because, psychologically speaking, the action of lending has changed the balance of power. The lender becomes superior (高一级的), while the borrower may feel awkward with the new arrangement. Likewise, if you try to advise them on what to do with the money, it might make things difficult between you two. In other words, let go - and see it as their money.
And if you can’t afford to lend something, don’t. Saying “no” is hard when a friend comes asking, but if you need that money, refusing them is probably the safest course of action. If you still feel the need to lend, making a legally binding (有法律约束的) agreement and putting things down in writing could guarantee instalments (分期付款) or deadlines. But, some friends may not take too kindly to being asked to make it official - seeing it as a lack of trust.
Finally, for some, it’s best to just see the money as a gift and be pleasantly surprised if something comes back. And if you do want to keep your friendship, when you need to borrow some money, perhaps a bank is a better option.
【小题1】What does the underlined word “detrimental” in paragraph 1 probably mean?| A．beneficial |
| B．important |
| C．necessary |
| D．harmful |
| A．You’d rather be a lender than a borrower. |
| B．Whether you lend it or not, your friendship will be unbalanced. |
| C．Sometimes refusing is not a bad option. |
| D．If you are true friends, you will lend your money to your friends. |
| A．By listing examples. |
| B．By making comparison. |
| C．By analyzing data. |
| D．By explaining cause and effect. |
| A．Borrow from your family members rather than your friend. |
| B．Borrow the money from the bank. |
| C．Borrow the money from your friend and see him (her) as superior. |
| D．Borrow the money and see it as yours. |
