Friendships can bring joy or sorrow. Since there’s no rule book on what to do when things get tense (紧张), we talked to researchers, authors, and therapists to learn how to manage the common relationship difficulties we all face.
Broken promises
Friends are important for our physical and mental well-being but these relationships aren’t always smooth.
Experiencing envy
“Sometimes envy shows our deepest wishes,” says Dr. Yager. “
There’s no worse feeling than when you check Facebook Monday morning to find out that your friends went on a weekend getaway without you. Scott Christnelly, a therapist, says, “I encourage clients to express their feelings about it but also not to jump to conclusions.” Then find someone else to talk to — maybe a family member, or a close friend (not one who went on the trip) — to explain how you feel. Maybe through that conversation you can brainstorm how you will respond.
A.Feeling left out |
B.Hopefully, it helps |
C.Learn to be independent |
D.But while it may be painful |
E.It possibly gets you inspired by your friend’s success |
F.Friend breakups can be just as painful as a romantic split |
G.In fact, experiencing some serious hurt from your friends is common |
If you are an online shopping addict, it means that your closet will become an awful wasteland. Here are some tips to organize your clothes and save space.
The first step to get organized is to get rid of the things you don’t want or need anymore.
A.Too much jewellery without much space? |
B.I know it's hard to let go, but you have to. |
C.Sick of digging around to find what you need? |
D.Use the space both above and below the stick. |
E.These little items are far handier than you might think. |
F.Take advantage of your empty suitcases when not on vacation. |
G.For example, drawers for folded items, hangers for dresses and suits. |
Are you in an unhealthy relationship with yourself?
Do you tell yourself that your own thoughts, feelings, or reactions are not important? Are you standing in the way of your trying new things?
Start seeing your relationship with yourself as a true relationship.
Get to know yourself. When you know yourself, you make better decisions and have better self-control. Try grabbing a notebook and describing yourself using words and phrases.
Take yourself on a date. Spending time alone increases productivity and creativity. So, go to a museum, go out to eat with yourself, or go for a hike.
Have a hard conversation. What don’t you like about yourself? It’s okay that you don’t like everything about yourself. Examine the things you don’t like.
A.So many of us treat ourselves poorly. |
B.And it is one worthy of your time and effort. |
C.Either choose to accept them or change them. |
D.Let yourself relax and enjoy your own company. |
E.Write what makes you special and what motivates you. |
F.Are you blocking your own personal growth? |
G.How do we work to improve our relationship with ourselves? |
People are taught how to speak, but good sentence structure and a wide range of vocabulary words won’t always lead to being understood or understanding others.
The good news is that it’s never too late to learn how to communicate more effectively. The first step is to realize you’ re having communication issues.
You have the same fights over and over.
Your fights are about the same topic again and again. If this is happening, it means you don’t yet have the skills to resolve conflicts.
You don’t want to fight so you try not to bring up subjects that lead only to pain and disconnection. The problem is that avoiding them leads to pain and disconnection anyway. Unless you learn how to have hard conversations productively, you will get more and more disconnected until your relationship is in danger of ending.
You regularly feel misunderstood or unheard.
No matter how hard you try, you don’t feel understood. Perhaps your partner has expressed the same feeling. Over time the disconnected feeling does damage to your relationship. It’s important to learn how to communicate in a better way, so that both you and the other person feel heard and understood.
A.If you can’t resolve issues, they will continue to show up. |
B.Then, you can learn how to communicate in a more productive way. |
C.This requires more than just speaking to your partner or vice versa. |
D.You argue with your partners about some issues. |
E.Effective communication requires much more than being able to speak. |
F.If you leave conflicts unsettled, you will feel disconnected and lonely. |
G.You avoid discussing certain topics. |
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