Friendships can bring joy or sorrow. Since there’s no rule book on what to do when things get tense (紧张), we talked to researchers, authors, and therapists to learn how to manage the common relationship difficulties we all face. 【小题1】

Broken promises

Friends are important for our physical and mental well-being but these relationships aren’t always smooth. 【小题2】 And a major way this happens is through broken promises. Perhaps he canceled plans at the last minute or she declined to take part in an important party. 【小题3】 the first thing to do is remember that no one is perfect, says Jan Yager, PhD, friendship coach.

Experiencing envy

“Sometimes envy shows our deepest wishes,” says Dr. Yager. “【小题4】”she says. She points out that it could be the other way around as well. Your friends might have the same feeling as yours.

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There’s no worse feeling than when you check Facebook Monday morning to find out that your friends went on a weekend getaway without you. Scott Christnelly, a therapist, says, “I encourage clients to express their feelings about it but also not to jump to conclusions.” Then find someone else to talk to — maybe a family member, or a close friend (not one who went on the trip) — to explain how you feel. Maybe through that conversation you can brainstorm how you will respond.