Lonely? You’re hardly alone. Since COVID-19 struck, people of all ages have struggled with this. But even before the pandemic, loneliness was becoming a growing problem for teens — especially girls. That’s the finding of a new study. And that appears throughout industrial nations across the globe. The study linked rising loneliness to greater use of smartphones and the Internet over the same years.

Jean Twenge, a psychologist, took part in the study. Her team has found that since 2012, US teens have been spending less time together face-to-face.

The new study pulled its data from a survey. Some 1 million 15- and 16-year-old students from 37 countries took part in this survey in 2000, 2003, 2012, 2015 and 2018. Its questions mostly dealt with education. But they also included six statements about loneliness, such as “I feel awkward and out of place in my school”. Students could strongly disagree, disagree, agree or strongly agree with each statement.

“Smartphones can help keep us connected with friends,” says Twenge. “But they can also make people feel excluded (排斥).” Girls, especially, may feel this way. One reason may be that they like to post more photos and selfies (自拍照) than boys. Studies have shown that if those images don’t get a lot of “likes”, it can affect a teen’s mental health.

And there’s “phubbing”, a combination of “phone” and “snubbing (冷落)”. It’s that moment at which a friend or family member takes out a phone and keeps looking at it, paying no attention to everybody else, including you. Phubbing is one way technology can affect you, even when you’re not the one using it.

If technology causes loneliness, should we stop using it? “No, not at all,” argues Twenge. “Everybody of all ages is trying to figure out how we can best use technology and stay mentally healthy.” Her advice is to “use your smartphone for what it’s good for. Then put it away.” That includes putting it away overnight — ideally in another room.

Why can friendships be hard? Because often people aren't as honest and open as they should be. Sometimes, people end up getting hurt.

Most problems with friendships come up because people are just too selfish to care about the things that their friends need. They care about their own needs much more, which makes it hard for friendships to work. However, being selfish is part of human nature. A person is put together in order to take care of himself and his own needs, not necessarily those needs of other people. Even though being selfish is something that all humans are born with, it is something that everyone should guard against.

The best thing to remember when you are a friend to anyone is that you need to treat your friend the same way as you'd like to be treated. This is wonderful advice for a friendship, because it is really the only way to make sure that you are giving your friend everything you would want to be given in a friendship. Whenever you have a question about how you should treat a friend, it is easy to find an answer simply by asking yourself what you would like your friend to do for you, if he or she is in your shoes.

Even if you're always thinking about how you'd like to be treated, and your friends are too, there are issues that come up from time to time in each friendship, and it is important to understand how to deal with these issues so that you can build stronger and healthier friendships. Issues like friends getting boyfriends or girlfriends and not spending enough time with their friends, or even friends finding new friends and leaving old friends behind are issues that will probably come up with one or more of your friendships. It is important to know how to deal with these issues so that you can keep your friends and make new ones. No one wants to have a broken friendship.

One of the most important things in the world is friendship. In order to have friends, you have to be a friend. But how can you be a good friend at school?

Listen—Listen when they are talking. Don’t say anything unless they ask you a question. Sometimes it’s not necessary for you to have anything to say；they just need someone to talk to about their feelings.

Help them—If your friend is ever in need of something, be there to help them. You should try to put them first, but make sure you don’t do everything they want you to do. Try to take an extra pencil or pen with you to classes in case they forget one. Have a little extra money in your pocket in case they forget something they need.

Be there for them—Try to make something for your friends to help make them feel better in hard times. Making cards and encouraging them are among the nicest things you can do for friends. Marilyn Monroe, a famous U.S. actor, once said, “I often make mistakes. Sometimes I am out of control. But if you can’t stay with me at my worst, you are sure not to deserve to be with me at my best.” Always remember this! If you don’t want to stay with your friends when they’re in hard times, then you don’t deserve to be with them when they’re having a good time!

       Try to organize some activities with your friends ahead of time. Go shopping, go for ice cream, have a party, go to the movies and so on. Take time to know each other even better by doing something you both enjoy. By planning things together, you both can have a good time. And you’ll remember these things when you’re all old!