The Truth Is Out

Human beings are not born liars, but the moment we can form complete sentences we begin lying to protect the feelings of others, to avoid punishment and conflict, and, most frequently, because lying gives advantages the truth wouldn’t provide. Lying gets results.

One study by Bella DePaulo, a professor of psychology at the University of Virginia, found lies played a part in 30-38 percent of people’s social interactions. Socially skillful people told a lot more lies than their more awkward coworkers. 【小题1】

Nowhere is this more obvious than on the singles scene. First dates have always involved a certain amount of self-boast, but some singles now regard out-and-out deceit (欺骗) as a reasonable strategy.

Experts believe that increased competition and the higher expectations among singles, along with the popularity of Internet dating, are encouraging outbreaks of deceitfulness. The problem is that many singles are presenting images of themselves that are impossible to live up to, and costing their already limited chances of long-term love in the process. 【小题2】

Of course, long-term lovers aren’t immune (不受影响) to the conflict-avoiding, problem-burying lie either. Once again, a pleasant singles scene coupled with unrealistic expectations has put new pressure on less-than-faultless relationships and tempted many into more serious deception. A study last year by Cahoot found that a majority of partners lie to each other about their personal financial situation. Other studies have found that women appreciate wise lies about their weight or looks.

【小题3】 In this context, might a policy of honesty at all costs upset the delicate balance of deceit that we’ve involved in by chance over the past few years? Could lying, as some people suggest, be little more than the latest social art?

Possibly. After all, few of us feel that lying is wrong any more. 【小题4】 But then that, of course, is the real issue. We might be great and frequent liars these days, but we’re not any better at recovering or forgiving, if we discover that we’ve been lied to.