How to Deal with Rudeness

When you encounter rude people, do your best to maintain your dignity. That might make them madder, but only you have control over your own behavior and the way you deal with them. And whatever you do, never let the other person’s bad behavior drive you crazy. 【小题1】

Show empathy(同理心) and sympathy

This requires understanding why the person is being rude. For example, if someone yells at someone else in public (even you), you might mention that you totally understand how he’s feeling. If it’s a momentary improper behavior, he’ll probably apologize. Accept it and move on. If he gets angrier, let it go. 【小题2】

Call the person out on his behavior

If someone is always rude to you, ask him if he realizes what he says or does shows a lack of respect for others. He might not realize he’s being rude. 【小题3】If he doesn’t, then you need to avoid this person.

【小题4】

Sometimes it’s best to just walk away. If the person is still saying impolite things or acting out, his lack of an audience will calm him down. If the rudeness is more of a habit, he might realize it’s time to make a change if everyone is walking around him.

Offer extra kindness

【小题5】 However, if you are able to keep your head up and set an example, sometimes the other person will eventually calm down and follow your lead. Don’t count on this happening, but it might be worth a shot if you don’t have a choice but to be around him.

Active listening

We often focus on saying what we want to say in an effective way and forget that listening carefully to others is just as important. The good news is that we can learn how to improve our listening skills. 【小题1】 Much of the time, we listen passively, so by making an effort to listen actively, we can improve our listening skills and develop necessary relationships more easily. Here are a few tips to help you start listening more actively.

Never underestimate（低估） the importance of nonverbal communication. 【小题2】 One study found that nonverbal factors were responsible for 93 percent of communication effectiveness. While not all experts agree that the percentage is as high as this, they do agree that nonverbal communication is extremely powerful. So, when you listen to another person, pay close attention to his tone of voice, facial expressions and body language.

Have an open mind. Do your best to put your own feelings and opinions aside while you listen, and encourage the speaker to fully express his ideas. Try to imagine that you are in the same situation as the speaker. 【小题3】

Repeat what the speaker has said. By repeating the speaker's words, such as by saying "So, you feel unhappy." or "【小题4】", you are performing two important functions of an active listener. One is showing the other person you have been following what he was saying and the other is giving the speaker the chance to correct you if you have misunderstood. This technique is especially useful in highly emotional situations.

【小题5】 If you do that, you have stopped listening and started talking. Once you put your mind to listening more actively, you will find the practice has many benefits.

Have you ever heard of the phrase “we just can’t communicate”? Most people communicate with the ability to read or write well. This might not be the case as you will soon find out.

How many times have you been to the doctor’s office and listened to an educated professional explain something to you that is just unintelligible. These people keep asking you, “Do you understand?” and sometimes out of embarrassment because you don’t want to look like stupid, you tell them. “Yes, I do understand.” This isn’t a good way to communicate, either.

How do we communicate in a positive way to get our points across? Ask the persons you are communicating with if they understand what you just said. In another case, if someone is talking to you, use the statement, “Just to make sure that I understand what you just said” and then repeat back your understanding of their conversation. Sometimes just asking a few simple questions and clarifying your understanding can bring great benefits to any communication.

In some countries like Japan, you might find them reading your body language more than the words you are communicating with. Sometimes just by the way someone stands or reacts to something you said, you can get a valuable insight to what the other person means in this conversation. Don’t forget, however, this could also lead to a misunderstanding. Again if you think someone is communicating with their body language, try not to assume that you know exactly what message they are trying to get across. Always ask them if they understand what you are talking about.

A person is responsible for what he says and to make sure that the other person completely understands the point he is trying to get across. Why not start using some of the simple skills in this article to help with your communication skill? You will start to see the benefits within a short period of time.