I remember when I got my first well-paid job right out of college, I still had low self-esteem (自尊) and self-doubt. 【小题1】 So what is the secret to success and why is it so hard for us to achieve it? Here are the top two things that I’ve found truly successful people all have in common.

【小题2】

People who find true success don’t achieve it by accident. They are very intentional and do the hard work to figure out what matters to them most. 【小题3】

The ones who achieve true success know that life isn’t about making life easier, it’s about making yourself stronger. And the only way to get yourself stronger is to stop sitting on the sidelines letting life go by and give everything your best shot.

Keep their minds out of survival mode (模式).

There’s a special part in your brain. 【小题4】 Usually fears that kick in will force your brain into survival mode. When you are in survival mode, you don’t spend enough time on what changes you can make to get yourself out of it. So how do you get your brain out of survival mode? 【小题5】 Meditation (冥想) can help you get out of survival mode and activate the part of your brain that is capable of very important functions needed to help you change your situation.

David Bennett, a 57-year-old man from the US, received the world’s first pig heart transplant in January. He died two months later, on March 9.

It may sound like a failure, but it actually is a big step forward in medical history towards xenotransplantation (异种器官移植) success.

Xenotransplantation has been a hot topic in medical research for many years, as doctors and scientists look for ways to solve the big problem of organ transplant waiting lists. In the US alone, over 100,000 patients are on a list waiting for new organs. Many of them will die before getting their chance to receive a heart, lung or kidney. Therefore, medical science has turned to animal organs.

Doctors have experimented with xenotransplantation since the early 20th century. There are few success stories. Usually, patients’ bodies reject (排斥) the animal organs. Bennett lived much longer than other xenotransplant patients. That’s because scientists removed pig genes that would cause fast rejection. Then they added human genes to help the body accept the organ.

“A lot of new information will come out that will help the field move forward at a faster pace,” Muhammad Mohiuddin, director of the transplant program, told The Guardian.

Aside from Bennett’s gene-edited pig heart, late last year doctors at New York University achieved some success in attaching pig kidneys to human blood vessels outside the body in patients on life support. Meanwhile, at the University of Alabama, doctors managed to actually implant gene-edited pig kidneys into a patient on life support.

Though these recent successes were short-lived, they show that there may be a way forward for xenotransplants.

We all know that friends are special people who we share our lives with, and who share their lives with us in return. But seeking friends and keeping the friendship going are never easy.

According to research recently published in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, the key is to use “we-talk”.

Led by University of California psychologist Megan Robbins and her colleague, the researchers reviewed and analyzed 30 different studies involving over 5,000 participants. This largest-ever analysis “we-talk” suggested that the frequent use of “we” and “us” is linked to happier and healthier relationships.

The word “we” moves people from an individual position into a partnership, which makes us more interdependent. “The pronouns offer an insight into whether people see themselves as individuals or as part of a whole… Word use is a window into what people are thinking and feeling without asking them,” Robbins told Science Daily.

Their research also found that “we-talk” is helpful for solvi ng conflicts. “The primary point is that interdependence may bring about supportive and relationship-centered behaviors and positive perceptions of the partner—especially important in times of stress and conflict,” according to a statement released by Robbins’ lab.

US-based magazine Psychology Today used the word “union” to describe the impact on a partner upon hearing “we-talk”.

Contrary to “we-talk”. there is “I-talk”, which refers to the frequent use of first-person-singular pronouns, such as “I”, “me” and “mine”, when writing or speaking.

Earlier this year, researchers from the University of Arizona, US, analyzed set of data that came from 4.700 people in Germany and the US. They found that too much “I-talk” was an accurate linguistic marker for the likelihood that someone is feeling stressed or experiencing negative emotions.

“If you are speaking in a personal context—so you’re speaking about something that’s of relevance to you”, lead researcher Allison Tackman told The Independent. “But if you’re communicating in a context that’s more impersonal, such as describing a picture, we did not see the relationship emerge.”

As you can see from the two studies, too much “I-talk” can make you feel depressed. But “we-talk” can encourage you to become more positive and create a chain effect of healthy interdependence with others.

So next time you’re talking to a friend, try using more “we-talk”. You may find yourself feeling more positive and the effect it will have on your friend will be positive as well.