Most parents are horrified the first time they catch their kid out in a lie. Just how worried should you be if your little one has started lying, and how can you encourage them to tell the truth?

According to child and teen psychiatrist Gayani DeSilva, MD, lying can actually be a sign of healthy development in young children.

“Kids lie for many reasons, and much of it is normal.” DeSilva says. “People are not born with the tools of interacting with others and getting their needs met. They must learn how to communicate those needs in appropriate ways, and they’ll experiment with different communication techniques until they find the ones that work best for them. Lying is one of those techniques.”

For instance, at age two or three, kids may lie as they experiment with pushing limits to see what behaviors are acceptable and what aren’t. As kids get older, they become more aware of how their actions affect others. Many lie less frequently because they know it could hurt someone else’s feelings or trust. Teens were most likely to consider lying an acceptable behavior if it was to help somebody or keep a personal secret, but not if it was likely to cause harm to somebody.

Just because lying is, in most cases, normal, doesn’t mean it should be ignored. If you know your child is lying, what should you do? When a child lies, look at them directly and ask, “What do you need?” After they tell you, gently remind them that telling you directly will be more effective than lying.

Also, it’s a good idea to model the behavior you want to see in your kids. In other words, don’t lie to your children. This will set you and your children on a course of open communication, trust, and satisfaction that needs and wants are understood and met.

Generally, a child who is neglected will lie more than a child who has attentive and responsive parents. By paying attention to the reasons behind a small lie, parents can figure out if there’s a need that’s not being met.

【小题1】Why do kids lie according to DeSilva?

A．To get their needs met.	B．To improve their communication skills.
C．To avoid hurting someone else’s feelings.	D．To be aware of how their actions affect others.

【小题2】Why do kids lie less frequently as they grow older?

A．They think lying limits their behaviors.	B．They realize the negative effects of lying.
C．They consider lying an acceptable behavior.	D．They want to help people who are neglected.

【小题3】What are parents advised to do concerning their kids lying?

A．Give them whatever they need.	B．Pretend not to notice their lies.
C．Set a good example to them.	D．Remind them not to lie again.

【小题4】What does the author think of kids lying?

A．Acceptable and appropriate.	B．Harmful and worrying.
C．Normal and understandable.	D．Healthy and effective.