This is my son Matthew’s last night at home before college. I know that this is good news. I feel proud that Matthew will go to a great school. I know that this is his finest hour. But looking at the suitcases on his bed sends me out of the room to a hidden corner where I can’t stop crying.

Through the sorrow, I feel a rising embarrassment. “Pull yourself together!” I tell myself. There are parents sending their kids off to battle zones. How dare I feel so shattered?

One of the great gifts of my life has been having my boys, Matthew and John Owen. Through them, I have explored the mysterious, complicated bond between fathers and sons. As my wife and I raised them, I have discovered the love and loss between my father and me. After my parents’ divorce, I spent weekends with my dad in Ohio. By the time Sunday rolled around, I was unable to enjoy the day’s activities because I was already afraid of the goodbye of the evening.

Now, standing among Matthew’s accumulation of possessions, I realize it’s me who has become a boy again. All my sadness and longing to hold on to things are back, sweeping over me as they did when I was a child.

His bed is tidy and spare. It already has the feel of a guest bed. In my mind I replay wrapping him in his favorite blanket. That was our nightly routine until one evening he said, “Daddy, I don’t think I need a blanket tonight.” I think of all the times we lay among the covers reading. I look at the bed and think of all the recent times I was annoyed at how late he was sleeping. I’ll never have to worry about that again, I realize.

For his part, Matthew has been a rock. He is treating his leaving as just another day at the office. And I’m glad. After all, someone’s got to be strong. I’m proud that he is charging into the first chapter of his adult life with such confidence.

A video of a young boy waving to ask his dad for one extra hug before he drives off to work is capturing the hearts of social media users online.

Tyler Lobdell shared a 31-second clip on his TikTok page, which now has over 1.5 million views. Lobdell, a father of two, told Good Morning America he had the idea to check his doorbell camera recently when he came across the special moment and couldn’t resist watching it over and over.

“I watched it 150 times before I posted it because I’m just watching it and its making me emotional watching it and I just wanted people to feel what I felt watching it.” Lobdell said of his motivation to share the video of him and his son Isaiah.

Lobdell said even though he often showers his sons, Hudson and Isaiah, with hugs and kisses, the boys, who are now 6 and 8, still like to stop him before he leaves for work and occasionally request one more hug from him.

“They’ll catch me in the garage or come out, like Isaiah did that morning, and they’ll stop me for an extra hug,” Lobdell, an ironworker in Constantia, New York, explained. “They just do it randomly from time to time and I just love that they do that.”

“I always try to make sure that I’m reciprocating that love that they’re trying to show me,” he continued. “It’s a rough world out there and I don’t ever want my kids to ever feel that they can’t show me love or feel in any way that they’re not totally and completely loved by their parents.”

Lobdell said he encourages other parents to “be as present as possible” with their kids and take the opportunity to spend time with them because “time flies by so fast”. As for his young sons, Lobdell added that he wants them to know that no matter what they do, he’ll always support them and he’ll always be proud of them.