Tom and Jane planned a holiday at the lake, and they decided to take their children, Tim and Sarah, with them. However, Tim and Sarah wanted: to visit Disney World for their holiday or hire a yacht (游艇) in Hawaii. Camping by the lake wasn’t even on their list of holiday adventures.

“We can visit some of the islands too,” Jane said. “Your dad and I always wanted to explore the mysterious cabin on Moose Island.”

Mysterious cabin? The children were now far more interested in this lake holiday idea.

“We might see Big foot,” Tim said.

“Or some unusual species!” Sarah turned to her parents. “We’re in. When do we leave?”

The children’s excitement quickly disappeared when they arrived at the lake. While their parents were carrying their suitcases inside, Timand Sarah stood on the path and stared at the cabin they’d be staying in for the next week, complaining about the smell around, the dust, and the various small insects.

“We’re in nature now, kids. Enjoy the experience! Your dad is building a fire so we can have barbecued fish and potatoes baked in the coals. Isn’t that great?”

Sarah choked. “I am not eating food cooked in coals! I want takeaway instead.”

“Me too.” Tim was about to cry. “Holidays are supposed to be fun, Mom.”

“Come on, guys. There’s a lot of joy to be found in living a simple life and spending time together as a family.”

“People in the suburbs live a simple life, which is more like being homeless!” Sarah shouted

“Yeah,” Tim added. “How can there not be a single restaurant that delivers here? How do these people survive?”

“They eat coal potatoes!” Sarah laughed. “And fish they kill with their bare hands!”

Sarah ran away, and Tim followed. Jane buried her head in her hands. She realized she had to do something to correct their children’s attitude towards simple life. After dinner, she told all about this to Tom, who agreed with Jane. Then they came up with an idea.

Paragraph 1: The next morning, Tim and Sarah entered the main room to demand they leave immediately, but neither Mom nor Dad was in there.

Paragraph 2: When Tim was about to fall asleep, he heard the sound of heavy footsteps outside, which were approaching.

How often do you have a conversation with someone, and think you are paying attention to him or her, only to realize shortly afterwards that you can’t remember what he said? Or, perhaps you get distracted while he is speaking and miss the message that he is trying to deliver. In today’s busy world, modern life is full of distractions: TVs, radios, traffic noises, telephones, laptops and so on, which can make it difficult to listen with our full attention.

But how can we listen more effectively? Jon Kabat-Zinn, professor at the University of Massachusetts Medical School, put forward the idea of mindful listening. He said mindfulness means paying attention in a particular way, with a purpose, at the present moment and non-judgmentally.

When we listen mindfully, we can be aware of some barriers but still remain open to the speaker’s ideas and messages. Mindfulness encourages us to be aware of the present moment, let go of distractions and ignore physical and emotional reactions to what people say to us.

But how can we apply mindful listening to our life? Jon Kabat-Zinn describes three key elements of mindful listening that we can use to improve our listening skills.

First of all, be present. When we listen mindfully, our focus should be on the person we are listening to without distractions. Then develop empathy(共鸣). We often see the world through our own experiences. When we’re empathetic, we can understand a situation-from someone else’s point of view. At last, listen to our own “cues”. Our cues are the thoughts, feelings and physical reactions that we have when we feel anxious or angry, and they can block out ideas and perspectives that we’re uncomfortable with. Mindful listening can help us to be more aware of our cues, and allow us to choose not to let them block communication.

The rule is straightforward: simply “Listen”! Listen carefully and attentively. Pay full attention to the other person, and don’t let other thoughts, like what we are going to say next, distract us.

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