Children are starting on digital devices at ever younger ages, and opinions on the effects of children’s digital-media habits are deeply polarized (两极分化的).

Jean Twenge, a psychology professor, thinks excessive use of the Internet and social media makes children lonely and depressed and poses serious risks to their physical and particularly their mental health, sometimes to the point of driving them to suicide.

However, Daniel Kardefelt-Winther of the Innocenti research office of Unicef examined various evidence and found less cause for alarm than is often suggested. Most of the studies be examined seem to show that the technology helps children stay in touch with their friends and make new ones.

The relationship between the use of digital technology and children’s mental health, broadly speaking, appears to be u-shaped. Researchers have found that moderate use is beneficial, whereas either no use at all or extreme use could be harmful.

What worries some experts more is that screens are becoming part of the middle-class armoury (武器库) for perpetuating (巩固) social advantage. Children from well-off homes are enrolled in private classes to learn skills like “How to be a You Tuber”, which poorer parents cannot afford.

Do you have a suit or dress in the closet that you haven’t worn for years but are reluctant to get rid of? Maybe you say, “I can’t throw that away because I paid good money for it”. If you recognize this in yourself, then you are suffering from commitment to the sunk cost fallacy (谬论). It occurs when we feel that we have invested too much to quit. This psychological trap causes us to stick with a plan even if it no longer serves us and the costs clearly outweigh the benefits.

Arkes and Blumer conducted a survey showing that people are influenced by sunk cost fallacy in their decisions. Participants imagined spending $100 on a ski trip to Michigan and $50 on Wisconsin, realizing later they were for the same weekend. They were told Wisconsin would be more enjoyable. When asked which trip to take, 54% chose Michigan despite the reasonable choice being Wisconsin, because they had made a greater initial investment.

Sunk cost fallacy takes place when we let emotions cloud our decisions. Once we’ve invested in a choice, we feel guilt or regret if we don’t follow through. We fail to realize that past costs won’t be recovered. Instead, we base decisions on past costs, ignoring present and future costs and benefits. It might be because the pain of losing outweighs the joy of winning for us. We avoid losses, making choices based on avoiding the “loss” of our past investment instead of considering the benefits gained if we don’t continue our commitment.

No one can deny the fact that we benefit a lot from perseverance. So our society loves to emphasize perseverance. Never give up! Don’t waste. But only you know the right path for you. Sometimes walking away is the hardest choice of all. You might realize a path you’re on is no longer the right one or never was. That’s a painful realization.

I was driving to town on a beautiful summer day. The sky was full of clouds. The sun was dancing through the green trees with its golden light and I was smiling at the wonder of it.

Suddenly, a truck rounded in front of me, two feet over the center line. I pulled my wheel to the right as I just missed the truck on one side and a ditch on the other side. I noticed the other driver looking at his cell phone totally unaware of the near miss. I closed my mouth in order to avoid saying the words that I promised myself I would no longer use.

Later in town, I was coming out of a store when a yellow butterfly started to circle around my head. I smiled peacefully and held out my open hand. To my joy, the butterfly landed on it briefly and swung its wings before flying away. I looked around to see if anyone else noticed this small wonder, but the only two people near me had their heads down, looking at their cell phone screens.

I began to think that life is what happens while people are busy looking at their smart phones. Now I know that social media, computers and smart phones are all necessaries in our lives, but it doesn’t mean that they have to control our days or take over our lives. Amazingly, they all come with a power button. We can turn them off anytime we wish to.

Don’t let your smart phone take away your smart mind. Don’t let technology take over your soul. Use it when you need it, and turn it off when you don’t. Turn your heart on more and our phone on less. Share your kindness, your joy, your hugs, your laughter and your life that make others smile.